Sunday, 30 January 2011

Be even safer when dating online

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Have you thought of safe dating online and what it means? You have joined an online dating site and now know how easy it is for anybody to join. Just like kids using Facebook, Friendster and MySpace, safety is likely the last thing on your mind when you join the dating site.


Sometimes it only becomes relevant to people when it's too late, and they either find themselves in trouble or have spotted inconsistencies in the information provided to them by the person they are communicating with on the dating site - but it's always other people, not you. That's what I thought.


Like I did, many people believe that too much is made of the need for safe dating online, and that the problem is really very small. It might be small to them, but not to those that have been the victims of an online dating scam or even assault. Those that have been victims get very angry at how some play down the risks involved in meeting people through online dating sites.


In fact, it has been claimed by various sources and surveys that between 58% and 98% of sexual assaults and rape originating from online dating are never reported to the police. If that is the case then how can anybody claim that the problem is exaggerated if the figures are unknown? The first dates with anybody can be hazardous, irrespective of whether they originally met online or offline, and women have to take care irrespective of who they are meeting and where.


That was certainly the case with me, but this is not about me - it is about you, and you must be sure that you are safe online.


There are some simple steps you can use to ensure safe dating online when you meet people through online dating sites. The problem is generally of assault on women by men, so that shall be our focus here although the principles involved apply equally well to both men and women.


Most of these steps are iterated in just about every list you will find online, and it makes sense never to arrange a first date in a secluded place, never to visit the home of a stranger and always to have a friend around on your first date. What is not so obvious is that there is a lot that you can do before you even reach the dating stage to help ensure that you are safe dating online.


It is useful, for example, to learn and remember the facts stated in his profile: age, education, preferences in music and reading and any other information provided. You will then spot immediately he makes any mistakes - a liar needs a very good memory not to be caught out in such details as age or date of birth, when they were at school and where they went on vacation last year.


Men who try to pass themselves off as significantly younger than they really are will have problems with their photographs, will likely have voices that sound older than they claim to be and may occasionally slip up when remembering facts that should have occurred long before they were born.


These are all things that you should keep in mind when meeting somebody online for the first time. They are all among the basics of safe dating online, but there are many more advanced techniques that you can use to increase your safety and reduce the chances of you becoming another statistic in the police records of victims of sexual assault by meeting the wrong person through online dating.

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